The Signs
by Paresis
Summary: How long can you go on, hoping desperately for something that seems unattainable? In which Edmund is confused, Cor's oblivious, and Corin mopes.
1. Chapter 1

Edmund observed Corin discreetly, as he had been since the boy had arrived in Narnia. The normally rambunctious youth had been acting most unlike himself: drawn, pale and silent.

He had spoken scarcely over a dozen words over the past week, and Edmund had resolved to determine the cause of his silence.  
As Corin glanced, for the umpteenth time at his oblivious twin Edmund reflected that it shouldn't prove too difficult.

Cornering the adolescent proved to be much harder, however. Corin seemed to have an uncanny sense of perception; enabling him to realize when he was being followed, which Edmund would have admired, had this sense not been directed at evading him.  
He cursed as the wily youth slipped out of his sight, leading him to yet another dead end. For Aslan's sake, this was his castle!

How Corin seemed to know every nook and cranny was beyond him, and it was on the growing list of things to interrogate the prince about. As soon as he found the wretch, that was.

Finally, Edmund took control of the situation when Corin erred, turning left and leading them into the library. Edmund moved quickly, closing the doors and barring them with a lance borrowed from the suit of armor beside the door.

Corin acknowledged his defeat, though the smile he'd been wearing throughout the chase had slipped off his face.

"Quite a chase," Edmund observed quietly. "I had no idea that you had such extensive knowledge of the castle."

Corin looked innocently at the Narnian king. "I was simply taking a stroll through the castle, and decided I wanted to read. If I'd had any idea that His Majesty wanted to accompany me, I would of course have slowed down. "

Edmund rolled his eyes, but was silently relieved that Corin seemed to be himself again.

There was still a hint of melancholy in his eyes, though the blond tried to cover it with a fake smile.  
"How's Cor?" The king inquired out of the blue.

Corin let the fake smile slip off his face; realizing the Just King had discovered the reason for his sudden unhappiness. "I wouldn't know," he replied, and then asked a random question of his own: "how can you tell if someone loves you?"

Edmund closed his eyes, the answer coming easily to him, as he thought of another blue eyed blond he knew. "You see it in their eyes," the look of fondness in Peter's when Lucy did something particularly brave, when Susan showed her boundless mercy yet again, and even when he solved a complex problem with ease was hard to miss. "They love spending time with you, they can be themselves around you, they do things they don't like doing for you, they always stand up for you and they wouldn't be able to live without you."

Corin, who'd been turning paler and paler as Edmund continued his list, bolted out of the room almost before he was done talking.

Edmund looked bewilderedly at the spot where his younger counterpart had been, wondering what he'd done wrong.

* * *

Corin dashed out of the library at breakneck speed, racing to the guest bedroom he shared with his brother. He collapsed onto the bed, and buried his head under his pillow, feeling rather as though he had been stabbed in the gut.

King Edmund was close to his brother, anyone could see that. That meant he knew what he was talking about when he listed the signs of love.

Corin had known it before, known. Why then had he hoped? No matter how much he'd tried to convince himself, to steel his heart, there'd always been a part of him that still wouldn't listen, that kept him open, vulnerable. That part of him was the reason he ached, why tears bled through his pillow.

He had proof now.

It wasn't a mere speculation or errant doubt, it was fact.

His brother didn't love him.

* * *

AN: More nervous about this one. Edmund is so hard to write! And... yet I can somehow grasp how his mind works.. I hope I've conveyed that. Probably going to write two more chapters, the last of which will be Cor's POV.


	2. Chapter 2

If thy brother wrongs thee, remember not so much his wrong-doing, but more than ever that he is thy brother.  
Epictetus

* * *

Corin clenched his fists, and then made a conscious effort to clench them. He could do this. He'd faced centaurs, fawns, and even the wrath of Queen Lucy. One simple talk couldn't compare to the tongue lashing she'd given him, surely?

He took one last deep breath, trying to calm himself, before entering King Edmund's study.

The room was cluttered with books, papers and ink. It emitted a musty, pleasant aroma, glue, parchment, and something indefinable that seemed to invade every nook and cranny in Narnia: particularly the castle.

Corin muffled a startled yelp as King Edmund appeared suddenly from the behind one of the countless bookshelves.

King Edmund made no sign that he'd heard Corin's shocked hastily stifled exclamation, so Corin quickly smoothed his face back into a blank expression, purging all remnants of shock from his face.

"So," the Just King began imperiously. The intimidating effect he was going for was rather ruined when one of the precariously-balanced book stacks toppled down.

Edmund coughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. Corin stifled a smile. The smile was wiped straight off his face at Edmund's question:

"What happened yesterday?"

"I- I apologize, King Edmund, I should have asked your leave before exiting." Edmund raised an eyebrow at Corin's formality.

"That's not what I meant."

Corin nodded, looking downward. Here came the embarrassing part. "Iwaswonderingifyoucouldteachmehowgetsomeonetolove me."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Imeanitdoesn'tevenhavetobelove," Corin babbled, only to be cut off.

"Corin," Edmund instructed, "Breathe, then talk. With pauses in between words, please."

"I was wondering if you could teach me how to obtainsomeone'slove."

"Teach you how to obtain someone's love? Whatever for? And what does that have to do with my previous question?"

Corin blushed bright red. "Y-you know how you were telling me how to tell if someone loves you?"

Edmund nodded encouragingly.

"Well, I realized, actually I'd figured it out before, but I _knew _then, because of what you'd told me." Corin paused, bit his lip, and continued; "Cor doesn't love me, but I figured you and King Peter are so close, you could maybe, please teach me how to get him to love me? I mean, not that you got King Peter to love you, obviously he always loved you, but-"

"Wait, hold on- back up. You said you knew Cor doesn't love you, because of something _I_ said?"

Corin nodded, eyes still downcast.

"Corin, you realize different people express love differently? What I told you were based on what I've experienced. Cor's more reserved-"

"And I should be patient, I know!" Corin burst out impatiently. "I've had this talk with Father."

Edmund opened his mouth to explain to Corin that he likely didn't understand, but all his reassurances melted at the look on Corin's face. He looked heartbroken, and resigned, and an odd, strained smile played at the corners of his mouth, assuring Ed that he _did_ understand.

When Corin began speaking again, he was almost inaudible, a stark contrast to his previous volume. "I-it's just that I've tried _everything_! I tried going horse riding with him, tried learning to draw, I even begged Father to get me a horse just so we'd have something to talk about, but he doesn't even _look_ at me!"

Tears stung his eyes, and he rubbed roughly at them, embarrassed at the show of weakness. Edmund stayed silent, so he kept going. "He talks to me, but only when I talk to him, he's **never** started a conversation with me! I could understand if he was just shy, but he talks to _everyone_ but me. He doesn't even _like_ me."

He paused, tears streaking down his cheeks. He wiped at them angrily, realized now how hopeless the situation was, and made to leave the room.

"I apologize for wasting your time, King Edmund." He let out a mirthless laugh. "I suppose nothing _can_ be done."

Edmund opened his mouth to say something, but stopped at the look of horror dawning on Corin's face.

Cor stood in the doorway, tears ran down his cheeks as well, unlike his twin, he made no move to wipe them away.

"Is that what you think? That I don't **love** you?"

Corin didn't respond, darting behind his twin towards the door. The door closed behind him with an audible thud. He raced down the hallway, dodging startled scullery maids, ladies-in-waiting, and irritable burly guards. Just as he made his way through the secret passageway in the kitchen, he heard a voice, breathlessly apologizing to a guard. Cor.

Corin ran through the passage, about halfway out when he heard the door open with a creak, and the thudding of feet hitting the stone floor. Who-

Corin nearly smacked his forehead when he realized he'd inadvertently revealed this shortcut to Cor, in one of his desperate bids to make his twin talk to him. He hadn't realized his brother was listening. If he'd actually been listening… Corin clenched his fist when he realized that he'd revealed most of his shortcuts in that one-sided conversation. His only option was to lock himself into the bedroom.

He internally calculated his distance from the bedroom. He would be approaching the door right about…now!

He squinted in the harsh sunlight streaming from the windows, as he bolted past the passage way's door; he closed it with a thump.

That would hopefully by him enough time to—

Somewhere behind him, he heard the squeak of the abused door's hinges, and then a bang as it was once again slammed into the wall.

-escape.

He made it to the bedroom before being tackled to the ground by his exuberant twin.

"W-what are you doing, idiot?" Corin sputtered indignantly, squirming under Cor's tight hold.

Cor buried his face into his brother's chest, still panting breathlessly from their chase. "Did you mean it? About thinking I don't love you?"

"I don't _think_ that, I know it."

"'m sorry" he mumbled into Corin's shirt.

Corin sighed, and ran his fingers through the blond hair lying atop his chest. This was why he'd run from his brother, why he'd so desperately tried to hide his unhappiness. "Don't be."

"I _do _love you," Corin shook his head.

"You're feeling guilty, Cor. You don't have to lie to me."

Cor sat up at this, hurt and guilt mingling on his face. "You think I'd lie about something like that?"

Corin hastily amended his statement. "No, you're right. You're telling me what I want to hear."

"No! Why-why would you think that?"

"Because you've given me no reason to think otherwise." The minute Corin said this; he felt the need to clap a hand over his mouth. "Cor, I didn't mean it like-"

"Yes, you did. And you're right. I haven't been the best brother, but I want to-would you let me explain?" Cor looked hopefully at his younger brother, pleading with his eyes.

"Alright," Corin relented. "But..." he pulled himself up from under his brother, and guided them both onto the bed.

Cor smiled at him, and then proceeded to flop down on top of him, in an almost perfect mimicry of their earlier position.

Corin groaned as he was nearly squashed flat. "A little warning next time, please?"

Cor's smile held a hint of nervousness now. "You alright?"

"A bit late to be asking that, don't you think?" Corin complained. He began raking through his brother's hair again in silent apology when Cor's face fell.

"I told you about how I lived in Calormen, you remember?"

Corin nodded, a hand reaching to squeeze his brother's tightly. Cor smiled faintly and continued.

"I left out a lot. I ran away because the man who'd raised me, the man I'd thought was my father, had agreed to sell me into slavery."

Corin inhaled sharply, hands tightening on his brothers'. Cor paused again, and grinned at his brother.

"Don't." It's a plea more than it is a command.

Cor let the fake smile slip off his face. "That's part of the reason why. I can't lie to you. In Calormen, pretending was an essential survival trait. No one's ever been able to tell the difference between my fakes smiles and my real ones."

Corin closed his eyes, feeling his brother's hurt as acutely as though it was his own.

"I didn't actively try to avoid you, I suppose I was doing it subconsciously. It's just hard."

Corin looked up at his twin curiously. "What is?"

"This. Everything."

Corin tried to withdraw his hands at these words, trying to hide the hurt. Cor tightened his grasp.

"He used to hit me, you know?" The bland, matter of fact tone Cor used, combined with his words, nearly caused Corin to topple off the bed with shock.

"I'll _kill _him." There is no small amount of rage in Corin's snarl.

Cor furrowed his brow. "It wasn't often, just when he was drunk."

"Still, he hurt you!"

"This is the part that scares me."

Corin rewound their conversation mentally. "Which part?"

"This." Cor squeezed their joined hands. "Just caring about someone so much. I never thought I would. And, I never thought someone would care about me, never thought someone could get angry at the thought of someone hurting me."

"Well, I do. So get used to it."

Cor hesitated. "But, how do you know you'll keep caring? What if you wake up one day and realize you don't want me in your life anymore?"

"I will. Always. This isn't some stupid romance novel, Cor. I'm _always_ going to love you. I swear."

Cor looked tentatively hopeful. Corin froze, just then realizing something. "Wait, is this why you were avoiding me? Because you thought I'd get tired of you?"

Cor turned bright red, confirming the statement. Corin huffed, "I'm doing chores for a _month_ to earn that stupid horse that I didn't even want!"

Cor snickered. "I don't know, you seemed pretty enthusiastic about it. Until it threw you off, for, what was it… the fifth time or the sixth?"

Corin raised a pillow threateningly. "That's it!"

Cor dodged, and the pillow flew off course, veering towards the door, which opened at the exact moment the pillow landed…. Straight into King Edmund's startled face.

Both brother immediately pointed at each other, and proclaimed in unison: "he did it!" Then they both took off as King Edmund spat a mouthful of feathers and aimed.

The rest, as they say, is history.

* * *

AN: I don't think I got enough emotion in this chapter... Oh well, next is Cor's POV...


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Sorry, sorry! This was much later than I intially planned it to be, but life insists on hindering my stories. My only excuse is that I'm sick. Hopefully I didn't miss anything due to the cold.

* * *

The greater cantle of the world is lost

with very ignorance; we have kiss'd away

Kingdoms and provinces

-William Shakespeare

* * *

Cor ran his hands through his hair worriedly. His twin had been acting strang_e_ lately. And by strange, he meant formal, polite, and _quiet_. After nearly two months of nearly ceaseless chatter, the sudden silence was both awkward and wrong.

He bit his lip worriedly, wondering what to do. After a minute's thought, he nodded his head determinedly. Yes, going to King Edmund to advice was probably the best course of action.

Going to one of the other monarchs would have worked just as well, but Cor felt a strange connection with the dark haired king.

As he reached King Edmund's study-after checking both his bedroom and King Peter's and finding them empty- he heard the sound of a muffled voice.

Intending to come back later when the king wasn't preoccupied, he turned at the sound of a muffled thud. He opened the door warily, simply wanting to see if the room's occupants were alright. He froze at the sight of blond hair.

Corin stood near one of the room's many book stacks. His face was red as he repeated a statement. "…. Obtain someone's love."

"You want to obtain someone's love? Whatever ever for?" King Edmund asked curiously.

Cor stiffened at his brother's next statement; "Well, I realized, actually I'd figured it out before, but I _knew _then, because of what you'd told me." Corin babbled, clearly nervous. "Cor doesn't love me…"

The rest of Corin statement was left unheard by his older brother as he stood in mute horror. How long had his brother labored under that delusion? _Why_? Cor's silent musings were answered as he tuned back into the conversation as Corin smiled sadly.

Cor hated the look on his brother's face at that moment; the look of anguish, betrayal, and heartbreak. Corin's next words were so quiet, Cor had to strain to hear them.

"I-it's just that I've tried _everything_! I tried going horse riding with him, tried learning to draw, I even begged Father to get me a horse just so we'd have something to talk about, but he doesn't even _look_ at me!"

Cor froze guiltily. All of that was true, but he hadn't thought Corin had noticed. If anything, his shunning of his twin had made the younger more persistent. It was so like Corin to assume that _he_ was in the wrong, even when his older brother hurt him.

Tears ran down his cheeks, heart aching for his twin.

Corin continued speaking, a look of resignation on his face now. "…nothing can be done."

He was giving up?

Panicking, Cor blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Is that what you think? That I don't **love** you?"

Corin froze in horror, staring at his twin for a moment before disappearing into the door behind him. Cor looked uncertainly at the door, his previous guardian's words ringing in his ears; "there's no point in loving someone, you just get hurt in the end."

Cor hesitated a moment longer, but an image of Corin's tearstained face flashed in his mind, and he chose.

He raced after his twin, barely catching a glimpse of him rounding the corner. He weaved between bustling milk maids, strict tutors and tired guards, bumping into one of the latter by accident. He apologized even as he ran, throwing the apology over his shoulder.

Still following his minute glimpses of his brother's tunic, Cor paused when he ended up in the kitchen. He leaned on the door frame, gasping for air.

Suddenly, he recalled a conversation he'd had with his brother a week or so ago. "…you just go through the larder, there's a door at the very end, leading to the hallway."

Cor flung the larder door open and sure enough there was a door, still rattling lightly from its previous opening. He rushed through it, hearing a bang as it closed on the other end.

He ran faster, managing to catch his twin just as he entered the bedroom. He paused for a fraction of a second, before flinging himself bodily across onto his brother.

"W-what are you doing, idiot?" Corin sputtered indignantly.

Cor didn't respond for a second, panting into his brother's chest. "Did you mean it? About thinking I don't love you?"

"I don't _think_ that, I know it."

"'m sorry," he muttered helplessly, it's an apology for everything; ignoring his brother, causing his brother pain, being oblivious to that pain.

Corin doesn't understand the underlying meaning, or if he does, he doesn't accept it. He simply ran his hands through Cor's hair.

Strangely, all Cor felt a strange warmth, not the usual repulsion and fear he normally associated with being touched. He leaned unconsciously into the heat of those hands.

"I _do _love you," Corin shook his head.

"You're feeling guilty, Cor. You don't have to lie to me."

Cor sat up at this, feeling hurt. "You think I'd lie about something like that?"

"No, you're right. You're telling me what I want to hear."

"No! Why-why would you think that?"

"Because you've given me no reason to think otherwise." Cor felt rather as though he'd been slapped. His face must have reflected this, for Corin attempted to retract the statement."Cor, I didn't mean it like-"

"Yes, you did. And you're right. I haven't been the best brother, but I want to-would you let me explain?" Cor looked at his brother nervously. What would he do if Corin said no? He had every reason to.

"Alright," Corin agreed, unbeknown to his brother, Cor froze, shock and hope written all over his features

"But..." Of course there was a but. There had to be a condition. Corin couldn't possibly be so civil to someone who'd caused him so much pain. Before Cor could ponder in earnest what Corin would demand in return, his twin had pulled himself up from under his brother, and guided them both onto the bed.

Cor smiled at him, and then proceeded to flop down on top of him, in an almost perfect mimicry of their earlier position, hoping he wasn't overstepping the boundary of brotherhood with the tackling and now this. He froze at Corin's protest.

Cor's smile held a hint of nervousness now. "You alright?"

"A bit late to be asking that, don't you think?" Corin complained. Cor tensed, preparing to get off his brother when Corin began playing with his hair again. Cor relaxed with an inaudible sigh.

"I told you about how I lived in Calormen, you remember?"

Corin nodded, a hand reaching to squeeze his brother's tightly. Cor smiled at the show of support.

"I left out a lot. I ran away because the man who'd raised me, the man I'd thought was my father, had agreed to sell me into slavery."

Corin inhaled sharply, hands tightening on his brothers'. Cor paused again, and smiled at his brother, using the fake smile he'd always used in Calormen.

"Don't." His brother's distress was obvious, and Cor was partially terrified and partially relieved his brother saw so easily through his façade.

"That's part of the reason why. I can't lie to you. In Calormen, pretending was an essential survival trait. No one's ever been able to tell the difference between my fakes smiles and my real ones."

Corin closed his eyes, and Cor had the odd sensation that his twin was actually _feeling _his pain.

"I didn't actively try to avoid you, I suppose I was doing it subconsciously. It's just hard." Cor tried to explain.

Corin looked up at his twin curiously. "What is?"

"This. Everything."

Corin tried to withdraw his hands at these words to hide the hurt. Cor tightened his grasp, both unwilling and unable to let go off his twin. He needed the support for his next words. Please, please let his next reaction not be disgust.

"He used to hit me, you know?" Cor tried for a bland tone, insides contorting in nervousness, anxiety only increasing when his brother nearly fell off the bed.

"I'll _kill _him." There was no small amount of rage in Corin's snarl.

Cor furrowed his brow, unable to understand why his brother was so angry. "It wasn't often, just when he was drunk."

"Still, he hurt you!" Cor froze. His brother was _worried_ about him. Still, his 'father's words still echoed relentlessly in his mind.

"This is the part that scares me."

Corin frowns. "Which part?"

"This." Cor squeezed their joined hands. "Just caring about someone so much. I never thought I would. And, I never thought someone would care about me, never thought someone could get angry at the thought of someone hurting me."

"Well, I do. So get used to it."

Cor hesitated. "But, how do you know you'll keep caring? What if you wake up one day and realize you don't want me in your life anymore?"

"I will. Always. This isn't some stupid romance novel, Cor. I'm _always_ going to love you. I swear."

Cor looked tentatively hopeful. "Wait, is this why you were avoiding me? Because you thought I'd get tired of you?"

Cor turned bright red. Corin complained, in mock annoyance, "I'm doing chores for a _month_ to earn that stupid horse that I didn't even want!"

Cor snickered, unable to resist irritating his twin further. "I don't know, you seemed pretty enthusiastic about it. Until it threw you off, for, what was it… the fifth time or the sixth?"

Corin raised a pillow threateningly. "That's it!"

Cor dodged instinctively, an arm coming to block the incoming object, causing it to veer off course.

Right into the surprised face of Narnia's youngest male monarch.

Cor bit his lip; about to start apologizing, only to break out into startled laughter when King Edmund threw the same pillow at Corin.

Corin grabbed his elder brother's arm with a war cry, and so it began.

* * *

AN: Thanks for reading, and for any (and all) favorites and reviews!

Please don't hesitate to tell me if I've made any mistakes, I'm looking for a beta at the moment.


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